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Preparing for the Zombocalypse

One thing everyone who intends to survive the Zombie Apocalypse will need is a good gun. For that truly personal undead-slaying touch, however, you don’t need A gun, you need YOUR gun. Something uniquely personal. Something, preferably, you made yourself. This, of course, will require you to fill out the proper BATFE paperwork:

Zombies Form

Image: “State Why You Intend To Make Firearm”(sic): Zombies

Please note that the BATFE acknowledges the inevitability of the Zombocalypse and, as demonstrated by their approval of the above form, accept “Zombies” as an acceptable reason for the manufacture of one’s own firearm.

Of course, it’s not enough to just make ANY firearm for zombie-slaying. No no, one needs the RIGHT gun for zombie slaying. Fortunately for all of us, a couple of readers of The High Road have pushed the envelope in anti-zombie firearm technology to bring us the Remington 1740.

Remington 1740

Image: The Remington 1740 is the finest anti-zombie personal firearm available today. (Click to Embiggen)

Yes, ladies and gentleman, you are looking at Remington 1740, made by the union in functional matrimony of a right-handed and a left-handed Remington 870 shotgun. The resulting scattergun is the first pump-action double-barrel shotgun of which I’m aware. (The one in the Phantasm movies doesn’t count, since it’s a movie prop. . . Besides, I’m pretty sure it had four barrels.) Though unwieldy (each Remington 870 is, after all, about 7 or 8 pounds unloaded), it is sure to deliver plenty of undead-slaying power, not to mention hours of entertainment and good, safe fun between now and the inevitable rise of the undead hordes.

(Hat tip to Traction Control and The LawDog Files for images.)

Posted in Guns.

One Response

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  1. Josh?! says

    Dude! This is the funniest post I have read in a long time! Love the fact that they approved the app. Thanks for the relief.